UB Zombies Sideboard

[magicman82]

Out of curiosity, against what decks would I sideboard in Surgical Extraction? I would think that such a card would only be useful against combo decks, of which I don't any exist in Standard.

[rainbowdash]

frites and solar flare, kill their Unburial Rites and elesh norns
ub zombies mirror match, kill gravecrawlers for good or stop geralfs messenger from coming back
vs mage blade you could use it but Nihil Spellbomb would be better, no snapcaster targets and no damage from pike
rdw, kill chandras pheonix forever
bw tokens/lingering spirits/any dekc that uses lingering souls, stop them from flashbacking lingering souls or ever playing one again

thats all i can think of at the moment but its a great card, useful in more situations than you would think.

[magicman82]

I think that UB Zombies is just a really bad deck now. According to my testing, I'm losing 50% of my games to having too few lands, too few creatures, or too few removal spells, even after siding in up to 16. It requires getting the perfect hand to win anything. I just don't get it. My only other option is to play a deck that is extremely popular and have to deal with even more luck in mirror matchups. Oh well. Thanks for trying.

[magicman82]

I've been tinkering with my UB Zombies deck and have been getting horrible results with it. It seems impossible, but I keep on failing to draw enough creatures, lands, or removal spells, depending on the situation. Even against decks that don't utilize card drawing, I always feel like I'm behind the game. Of course, there's always the unbeatable draw where I get a perfect mana curve, but that doesn't happen very often. Here's what I've got, along with my sideboarding strategies against the major archtypes.

Main Deck
4 Diregraf Captain
4 Diregraf Ghoul
4 Geralf's Messenger
4 Gravecrawler
4 Highborn Ghoul
4 Phantasmal Image
3 Phyrexian Obliterator

4 Go for the Throat
3 Mortarpod
4 Tragic Slip

4 Darkslick Shores
4 Drowned Catacomb
14 Swamp

The main deck is pretty straight-forward. In theory, I really like this deck compared to most of the environment, because it's the most consistent. I've got 3-4 of everything, so my draws SHOULD be very consistent. I can't stand decks that run 1-2 of something without a tutor, unless there's a really good reason, like a Planeswalker or legendary creature. It just makes draws inconsistent.

I used to run Geth's Verdicts, instead of Go for the Throat, but since I'm having trouble with swarm decks, like Naya Pod, I think targeted removal is the way to go for the main deck. I would really like to run a fourth Mortarpod, but I suppose three is good enough. I tried Skinrender and Porcelain Legionnaire, but they just sat in my hand, more often than not.

Sideboard
2 Black Sun's Zenith (Naya Pod, Delver, Mage Blade, Humans)
4 Distress (Wolf Run, Solar Flare)
4 Geth's Verdict (Mage Blade, Wolf Run, Solar Flare)
1 Phyrexian Obliterator (Wolf Run)
2 Ratchet Bomb (Naya Pod, Delver, Mage Blade, Humans)
2 Sword of War and Peace (Humans)

vs. Naya Pod
-4 Go for the Throat; +2 Black Sun's Zenith, +2 Ratchet Bomb

The most popular deck in my local environment. I just can't deal with so many creatures. My best bet is to Hinder their mana acceleration, while saving my mass removal for later. I can use Phantasmal Image to deal with Elesh Norn. Along with Diregraf Captain, Zenith can turn into an alternate win condition for me. Still, it's a pretty bad matchup.

vs. Delver
-1 Phantasmal Image, -3 Phyrexian Obliterator;
+2 Black Sun's Zenith, +2 Ratchet Bomb

Obliterator isn't so good against Delver, since they have countermagic and Vapor Snag. I figure that having some mass removal would help if things get too hairy. Still, I've had a lot of success against Delver.

vs. Mage Blade
-4 Go for the Throat, -1 Phantasmal Image, -3 Phyrexian Obliterator;
+4 Geth's Verdict, +2 Black Sun's Zenith, +2 Ratchet Bomb

Very similar to Delver, but they usually have more hexproof creatures, so I like Geth's Verdict instead of Go for the Throat.

vs. Wolf Run
-4 Highborn Ghoul, -4 Phantasmal Image, -1 Mortarpod;
+4 Distress, +4 Geth's Verdict, +1 Phyrexian Obliterator

I've had a lot of success against Wolf Run too. They just don't have enough creatures. Obviously, Phantasmal Image is useless, since Wolf Run can just target it to kill it instantly. Really, I don't need as many creatures, because they don't run that many either. I can use Distress to take care of their mass removal, while adding Verdicts to take care of their larger creatures.

vs. Solar Flare
-3 Mortarpod, -1 Phantasmal Image, -4 Tragic Slip;
+4 Distress, +4 Geth's Verdict

They don't have any creatures with 1 toughness, so that removal is out. Distress takes care of mass removal, while Verdicts help against their larger creatures.

vs. Humans
-4 Go for the Throat, -2 Phantasmal Image;
+2 Black Sun's Zenith, +2 Ratchet Bomb, +2 Sword of War and Peace

Another tough matchup, due to their swarming. I try to side in what mass removal I have, but they always have too much spot removal for me to handle. Fortunately, it's not very popular.

Let me give you an example of why I don't like this deck now, despite how much I've thought this through. This is a match against Wolf Run. In Game 1, I go first. I start with two Swamps, plenty of cheap creatures, and removal. Sounds like a perfect hand, right? If I just draw one more land (preferably a blue source), I'm golden. Sadly, I never draw any more land, he gets his mass removal, and despite not overextending myself, I lose anyway. In Game 2, I get my Phyrexian Obliterator, and he can't deal with it, as expected. In Game 3, I have a good hand of mana, but draw zero Distress, and only one of my 14 removal spells that would have saved me.

This is how at least 50% of my matches go. That is a completely unacceptable win percentage, if I ever expect to win a PTQ. I'm not sure what I can do to change the results, even if that means switching decks.

Thanks a lot.

[magicman82]

What is an acceptable percent of losses due to manascrew and manaflood?

I seem to lose a lot of games to both, though significantly more to manaflooding. It's Magic Online, so I know that the deck is being properly randomized. Normally, I'd say that if I'm losing an equal number of games to both, then I've got the land count right. However, between the two, I'd prefer to be manaflooded, because at least that way, I can cast spells when I draw them. I would think it would be best to have too many lands than too few. Plus, most 4-0 versions of the deck are running 22 lands.

[Shadow_Seraph]

I would like to go ahead and merge this into the stickied thread for Zombie decks to remain in accordance with the sticky and official thread policy. If anyone has any particular objections to doing so, please let me know sometime in the next 24 hours.